(no subject)

Oh, yeah.  Thee who think underage persons can't read smut, take this!
http://straylight.law.cornell.edu/supct/html/96-511.ZS.html
Doesn't affect me anymore, but still.

On a sadder note, LJ Maas has died.  She who wrote "the" uber Xena stories, The Conqueror Series.  Also, she's written several original novels (that, in honor of her, I think I'm going to buy) and the beginning of a series of stories following two children from 2nd grade to adulthood called "Our Little World".  Which I really enjoyed (the first two parts that are up), though it was kind of a children's story.  It wasn't updated since 2001 though, so I wonder if she just abandoned it.

(no subject)

I owe Katie my US History grade.  But, even if I study for this test, that's gonna be like a D anyway, so I don't think she cares.  Totally spent like 30 minutes talking to her.  She never fails to make me feel horrifically bad.  Talking about these schools she's applying to transfer to, stuff like that.  I get all the material for those schools, I'm equally as smart and capable as she is, but she always does better.  On everything.  So I'm feeling horribly incompetent, gashed my hand on the frame of my bed (kinda sorta not quite accidentally), and stayed up until, on my not-yet-adjusted-to-this-weird-clock-change brain, 12:30.  But she sent me her US History notes.  So I suppose I should be happy.  Just can't help feeling that my life is so utterly meaningless, compared to hers.  Like the quote on the bottom of her emails, "It's not that I'm lazy. I just don't care. It's a problem of motivation."  Thing is, I do want to care.  I've never learned how.  I've never had to.  I'm the kid that aced everything all through elementary and middle school without having to think, and somehow, between then and now, screwed up her life so badly that she doesn't have any idea where she's going.  That's me.  I wasn't happy as a kid, I got picked on and stuff all the time.  But I was smart and I got good grades, and the teachers liked me.  Now I'm miserable, get bad grades, and the professors hate me.  I used to look at colleges.  WashU, Brown, stuff like that.  Now, I'm lucky to get straight B's, and can only see transferring into some state school.  I wanted to be a doctor, but doctors have to be smart.  They have to get good grades, they have to know things.  I wouldn't have a problem with medical school, I'm almost positive of that, because I'm interested in the subject.  Like now, I'm top of the class in Psychology, but I have B-C's in everything else.  But no good college would take me because I'm this screwed up, mentally unstable, ignorant moron who doesn't know how to use what she's got.