commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (BoP)
So, my days continue. I do science in my lab, fail at science inexplicably if it's organic chemistry, write poetry in the hour or two I have before poetry class on Thursday to hand in and am apparently not suck at it as I've got one of two As in the class, volunteer (sort of unvolunteery, as it wasn't exactly my choice) at this children's science museum, eat too much, exercise too little, and hate myself to excess.


Poetry )

Organic Chemistry )

Biomolecular Interactions )


I do need to stop just taking graded tests at their word. I'm not really checking any of them over at all, even just to see what I missed and make sure I learn it, which is bad. Mostly because I don't want to face these grades again, you know, as school is my entire measure of personal success. Basically, I'm pulling the same self-defeating shit I pulled all through high school except now I'm pulling it where it really matters and I'm not going to be able to sneak by anyway because This Is It.

I'm so fucking terrified that every little thing is going to be the one that stops me from going to medical school. I mean, I've talked about this frankly before--if I don't get in to medical school, I'm probably going to kill myself because I do not know what I'm going to do with my life. I've been saying that forever, but as this possible future appears to be becoming a probability (my MCAT scores on the practice test sucking, now my grades as usual being not good), you'd expect that I'd back off from that a bit, especially as how I've been all "Ooh, I wish I could do this and that and major in this and go work in politics blah blah" lately. Not at all. It's not because I don't know what else I can do with my life (I'd have to switch majors, but I love politics crazy hard, and I could see myself teaching AP biology or chemistry [ha! but I did well in genchem] or even English), but because this is, on Alexandria scale, the ultimate failure. If something that has guided every single decision I have ever made in my life ends up not coming to fruition, what the fuck have I lived the past 19 years for?

Anyway. Either my nap today was more productive than I thought (I was waking up every couple of minutes, though, so I doubt it) or I'm more miserable than I thought, because I just realized that it's the second day of daylight savings time, so my body should think it's almost 6am (though it's 5) and yet I'm not tired. Massive headache that I had most of yesterday and came back a few hours ago is also probably a contributing factor. Blargh.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Not for me.)
Dermatologists are freaking expensive.

Went to one a while ago to try and figure something out about my face. I've got the rosacea which makes me look like somebody slapped me around for 6 hours every time I exercise, eat spicy things, get too hot, put topical stuff on it (figured out that benzoyl peroxide, the acne medicine, is one of the main/worst ones that I react to, but only sometimes, and sometimes to other things too), or sometimes just when it feels like it. I've got acne; not a horrid amount, but it's bad when it's humid at all and I get about 1 of the gigantic, sometimes-scarring cystic things a month (though it's not period related, which sucks, because at least then I'd be able to know when I should screw the facial redness and start liberally applying zit cream). And on top of all that, my cheeks and sometimes my forehead are so dry they flake, so I can't wear makeup to cover up any of the previous, as it makes me look like a lizard shedding its skin.

So that's not fun. Normally, I'd be all "oh, face stuff's not going to kill you, just use zit cream or whatever" and not bother with the copay and perscription costs and such, but I've got such an abnormal combination of the rosacea reactivity and the acne and the dryness that means that literally anything I use for one is going to irritate the other two. The guy's answer two weeks ago or so was to use topical stuff for the rosacea (which is what I'm most worried about, as mine's already worse than my mom's, and it'll only get worse as I get older) and to put me on an antibiotic pill for the acne. I said no to the pill, because I'm not crazy about antibiotics period (when I get meningitis, I damn well want to not be resistant to any of the drugs because I'd been taking them for something stupid), much less for something like a little bit of acne, so I've got another cream for the acne that doesn't have benzoyl peroxide (you'd be surprised how many of even the common prescription ones have that in them), but still will probably dry me out like nobody's business, so I've not been using that one. Actually, I've not been using any of them because the samples ran out after 2 days or so.

Which brings us to today, so 400-someodd words later, I get to the point of this story. Expensive. I mean, I've got insurance and all, and the two creams are still $50 each. My other two prescriptions (my Ritalin and a migraine pill) that I got from the pharmacy today as well were only $5 each. Must remember to mandate to all doctors that I only will accept things with a generic from now on (like I did with my GP to get the generic migraine pill instead of the couple dollars a pill that my mom and sister pay for theirs. Mom took one of mine today to see if it works, because if it does, she's def. going to switch).

And that's my story. I'm exhausted, as I had my mock trial/fake jury panel thing all day today, so I missed my twisted-up bedtime by about 4 hours already. Tis a testiment to how tired I am (especially when you add to the previous that my stupid 4 day migraine has been making my sleep less than pleasant of late) that I know there's no way I'm waking up in time to go to the gym today and I don't even really care. Tomorrow is Psych, and I always go longer than usual because I want to make sure I'm well situated on a machine with a completely working TV (I usually just treadmill rather than the more intense machines because they have better TVs, LOL) well before it starts. Even though I usually don't care about the kid intro part.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
Being a rampant Psych fangirl right now. I've got like three fics open. And not that that's unusual for me at all, but the unusual part is that it's three I've just started writing. Of which there's only one that has the chance of ever seeing the light of day because the first probably will end up getting incorporated into the second, which is going to be hugely hugely long as it actually sort of Has Plot and thus will never get finished.

Especially because I can't decide on the crime for the plotted one. It's on a cruise ship, so it's got to be high enough priority that the detectives would be going undercover (yes, it's that sort of a fic), but low enough that the Feds would have just taken a cursory look around and dropped it. I've more or less solved the latter part by having the FBI look, not see anything, and let it go, but Commander Dunlap (Vick's sister--the Coast Guard doesn't investigate cruise crime, but acts as sort of a clearinghouse for reporting it) mentions it to Vick, asking her to keep an eye out because there's been a rash of whatevers (thefts aren't fun\dangerous enough, but murders seem like they'd be higher on the Feds' radar. I'm thinking disappearances) on the ships porting near Santa Barbara, and then Shawn "divines" that there's even more of a connection when he realizes that they're all gay cruises (yes, it's that sort of a fic).

So I've pretty much gotten it up to where I get them onto the ship, though who's going I'm not sure. Originally it was just Karen and Jules, but I'm having so much fun writing Lassiter in the parts leading up to boarding that I'm not sure I don't want him and Shawn to stowaway too (Psych is one of those shows where I can do Shawn/Gus or Shawn/Lassiter with no problem). The department is only covering the girls, natch, but I could make funny jokes about Lassiter needing to visit his mustache guy and then leave the image of him with one of those 70s gay handlebars in your heads. I think for the excuse to go undercover, Lassie might pay his own way. And Shawn might find some way to get put on as an entertainer, being all fakepsychic for them. Under a fake name, natch, because if somebody Googled Shawn Spencer, they'd see all kinds of SBPD stuff.

But the problem is that this was first and foremost a Jules/Karen fic, and the chances of any of it every getting done decrease exponentially if I have to keep bouncing between the boys and the girls. That's one of my biggest issues while I'm writing plotty fic; I feel the need to account for every single foot-shuffle, yawn, and eye twitch of the characters when we're following them. I've mostly broken my tendency to follow them 24/7 (I can now employ such timesavers as "after an uneventful drive, they arrived" rather than narrating the entire thing), but I'm, well, really fucking wordy.

Anyway. I'd be >500 words further on the fic(s) if I'd not just done this, LOLOL. Got to go to that pretend trial thing in an hour and a half (probably a bit earlier, as I'm not sure where I'm going), so looking forward to that. Not sure if I'm supposed to dress up (doubtful that it's overmuchly required or they'd mention it, but idk what everybody else is wearing), so probably going to find something that's Not Shorts at least.

Also. Getting sick, I fear. Migraine 3 days straight, and the migraineyness was tapering off today but my head started hurting differently. Wrote it off as just end-of-migraine-weirdness. And then came the throat tickle. Damn.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
Bible chapter that needs turned into a hit song? Ezekel 23. Contains such lines (in Young's Literal Translation) as:

2 Two women were daughters of one mother,
3 And they go a-whoring in Egypt, In their youth they have gone a-whoring, There they have bruised their breasts, And there they have dealt with the loves of their virginity. (This one's the chorus.)

8 And her whoredoms out of Egypt she hath not forsaken, For with her they lay in her youth, And they dealt with the loves of her virginity, And they pour out their whoredoms on her.

9 Therefore I have given her into the hand of her lovers, Into the hand of sons of Asshur on whom she doted.
10 They have uncovered her nakedness, Her sons and her daughters they have taken, And her by sword they have slain, And she is a name for women, And judgments they have done with her.
11 And see doth her sister Aholibah, And she maketh her doting love more corrupt than she, And her whoredoms than the whoredoms of her sister.

17 And come in unto her do sons of Babylon, To the bed of loves, And they defile her with their whoredoms, And she is defiled with them, And her soul is alienated from them.

19 And she multiplieth her whoredoms, To remember the days of her youth, When she went a-whoring in the land of Egypt.
20 And she doteth on their paramours, Whose flesh [is] the flesh of asses, And the issue of horses -- their issue.

NB: Yes, hung like donkeys comes from the bible. Who knew? That's how I originally found this passage, natch. You know how some people sign things with Bible verses or put them on their checks or something, just the book + chapter:verse? I wanted to start doing that with a fun one, just occasionally, to see if anybody ever looks them up.

First, I was thinking of the shellfish is an abomination one (which, thanks to President Bartlet, I can tell you is Leviticus 11:10), just to counter the homosexuality is an abomination verse later in the same book and because it's delightfully random, but the actual text isn't very poetic, so I went shopping around. From the site I found that highlighted 19 and 20 of this passage: This verse is particularly explicit, informing us that Egyptians are hung like farmyard animals, and can ejaculate in quantities to rival the annual flooding of the Nile. Keep in mind, the Egyptians were the Jews' former slave masters and are the bad guys in this story. So, you know their reputation for supreme endowment was well earned when the worst their enemies could say was, "Go on! Go back to those big-cocked bastards! I hope you're happy with their enormous dongs."

Finishing reading the aforementioned site (9 Most Badass Bible Verses on Cracked.com), and my stomach muscles are cramping up from the laughter (atm, as a result of the ball crushing bit). Seriously. I interweave the link no longer: read this.


In other, significantly more TMI news, a letter.

Dear Vagina.
Seriously, WTF? A super plus tampon in an hour? We're not 12 anymore, thanks.
Sincerely,
Alexandria

And to cap it off, I may need to scrounge up the dinero to pay my entire semester's tuition sometime next week, as the school decided to be a dickwad and change around their payment schedule so I only get my scholarship money a month after tuition is due. What. The. Fuck. Sure hope the parents are feeling generous, as 98% of my money's tied up in a CD until February.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Not for me.)
Combination of Delicious tags I never expected to use? Femslash + Owen/Tosh. LOLOL. I'm totally digging genderswap!Owen.

I wish there was some way I could broadcast to the internets "Hay, ad guys? I already get Netflix, so you can stop making ads for it pop up in other windows I don't notice until they've been draining my resources and slowing down my webaging for ages. Especially when you come from legitimate news type sites. Then it's really annoying. Kthxbai."


"Ted is like the angle opposite the hypotenuse. He's always right."

I love Better Off Ted. I'm kind of in love with Veronica/Linda. I don't even think it's just Portia, but there's something so easily slashable about them. How Veronica's always not jealous of Ted and Linda's UST because "that would imply that she wants something she can't have". Meaning that she either knows she could have Ted Linda whenever she wants, or already, you know, has her whenever she wants. And Linda's random comforting hug, and later her inability to define her and Veronica's relationship to Veronica's father, it works.


In other news. Brother keeps causing fights because he doesn't take his meds and then steals whatever laptop is lying around and stays up all night being loud right above me. I threaten to tell, because even though before I wouldn't, when his loudness and burning of incense/candles into the vent that carries down into my room give me migraines, this is going to stop. Parents don't seem to care, because now it's me he's raging at and not them, as usual when I'm not here. It's like they want me to take over and be the mom because they step back and just let it happen, and then even though he's doing the exact same thing he does to them, they make it some sibling fight thing and blame it on me. Since I'm the one his antics bother most/first, they don't care.

More of me being an ungrateful bitch. Birthday kinda sucked. I mean, I guess it's sort of once you're an adult, you don't get stuff from your parents anymore, but since I don't really have bunches of friends or birthday parties or go out on the town or anything, it was severely anti-climactic. I always tell them that I'd rather just have money than presents unless I've been very specific about what I wanted, but I think they took that as an excuse to just give me virtually nothing. Kay, I got an ice cream maker machine that I'd been asking for, but it turns out that it was the wrong type (I wanted the kind you just plugged in and didn't have to freeze, since there's never room in the freezer so I've got no chance of being able to use it at home), so it's nobody's fault that I'm not as happy about that one as I could be. I think it was just the fact that they had the nerve to give me another copy of one of the DVD seasons (West Wing season 2) that Tyler lost/stole/destroyed/whatever (I will never forgive him for that. It was two giant cases: all of West Wing, all of Xena, all of Deep Space Nine, all of Enterprise, two seasons of ER, and probably several others that I'm not remembering. He still claims he's never had any of them, but every time somebody cleans his room, we find various loose disks, usually scratched beyond repair, from out of them. And still keeps on claiming, because he's an idiot like that).

Seriously? I sort of think that that's just something Tyler should have to buy himself and give me. First of all, I saw it on sale and Kaci told me not to buy it--it cost $6. We're not talking high dollar replacement, seeing as how that's like $15 less than what I shelled out in the first place. Idk, I feel like I'm not allowed to feel this way because it's not really like they were under any kind of obligation beyond. . . fairness to get me anything, but when Kaci gets a bunch of stuff on her actual birthday (I'll have to ask her exactly what, as I don't remember, but I know it was, you know, completely sufficient in value for birthday gifts by itself) plus the promise to go buy some brand new book a few days later when it comes out and that book alone cost more than the entire value of everything I got, it's kinda. . . disappointing.

I try to figure it as I'm technically an adult, suppose, and she's 6 years younger, but it doesn't really help. We were poor when I was her age, so I never got anything near this shit that those two get every day, just for nothing. Everybody always figures it's the oldest that gets special treatment or whatnot, but when you've got a special-needs baby born just two years after you, the attention dies pretty damn quick, and I don't think I've ever gotten over that. If I were, idk, 3 years old I could totally see myself becoming one of those kids that acts out for attention (I think the only reason I wasn't is that I've always desperately wanted people to like me too much), because the only time I get two glances from my parents is when they're telling me what a horrible person I am.

So with dentist and endocrinologist appointment fail (I tried to set one, they called and just gave me a different number to call the office, and I've been sleeping so wackily that I haven't been awake during open office hours since) and continuous self-confidence decimating (as if I had enough of that to spread around in the first place) unexplainable weight gain (I think the last 7 pounds split evenly between my stomach and breasts, the latter of which I appreciate, but would give up in an instant if it meant I'd lose the former) and the arrival of my grandmother's birthday card with pictures from the last couple of years where I didn't look like a whale to rub it in, and the fact that school is coming up and I've been more miserable than I'd like to admit lately and so can't really picture myself handling another semester very well at the moment but don't really have any other option, things kinda suck.

/whinging
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
OK, so this is going to be a health related LJ update. I’m doing on this microphone that I found in my kitchen and using Vista’s speech recognition software, which is actually working pretty well, I think. Or was, until I just had to stop for 5 minutes and correct all the mistakes they had made. Mostly punctuation things, because I’m not used to having to say the punctuation out loud as I speak. And I tend use a lot of it. Which makes the speech rather awkward.

Anyway, went to the doctor yesterday and turns out all my face stuff is due to the rosacea. The sensitivities, the redness, the allergy to benzoyl peroxide, all of it is straight out of the Wikipedia article. Point of interest, hard to snack and dictate. I’m also using a really shitty microphone, which doesn’t help matters.
Went straight from the doctor to get my blood tested, because she is checking my thyroid like I wanted. Didn’t give me the Ritalin refill yet but I’m going to go back probably Friday once the results get in and get that plus something for the rosacea (which is worse than my mother’s, now that I attribute all these other symptoms to it correctly, which is uber not fair). I’ve seen some adverts for some new stuff lately too, so I’ll have to start looking closer at the research for this stuff.

The crook of my arm is all nastified now, though, with a big giant puncture wound surrounded by a bruise. Blech. I was thinking the entire time about how good the lady was at sticking me—it barely hurt at all. And then she took it out and was careless because she was done and that was fail, because she did it at sort of an angle and it pulled out funny and hurt and then bled.

I LOL at how I thought this would be somehow easier or faster. This is not the case. Switching back to actual typing now, because even if it was incredibly accurate, I think I type faster than I talk.

Dad got the call yesterday saying that he could finally get his insulin pump, naturally, right after he got on some new medicine that cut his insulin by 2/3. So now he’s not sure if he wants it, because it’s going to be like $900 plus $600 every three months in cartridges because the insurance refuses to cover it, and this new testosterone patch stuff at the lower dose he was on before (he just upped it, since the results rocked so hard the first time) cut him from about 100 units to a few days ago’s 37. His doctor wants him to go up even more, because of those kickass results and all the new research tying testosterone to diabetes—you’d think that the diabetes would wonkify his testosterone, but you don’t really think about the testosterone wonkifying his diabetes. Cool. Plus, since he’s been on it I’ve noticed. . . idk, he’s better. In general, mood wise. Not as cranky. He notices it too—he doesn’t need naps as much and such things. I like it.

On a completely unrelated note? I really want to write “Better Off Ted” crack!fic where Veronica and Linda mud-wrestle except in coffee creamer, for some reason. Mostly because the first episode really made me want to slash those two and, you know, the creamer thing.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
Just testing out the "post from email" option.  For the third time, as it's not liking me.  Perhaps it's on a lag, and because I just set it up a few hours ago it takes a while for LJ to acknowledge that this email is an accepted post-from venue.  Or they're all backed up in LJ and will all post at once.  Either way, some three-plus copies of this will probably show up at some point, LOL.

Third time failed, and thus we're posting from Semagic as usual. Don't know why that's not working, but the above reasons are probably at least part.

So, Psych on Friday? Not a fan. Really just wasn't very funny, IMO. The whole Lassiter scene was quite touching, but we'd all called it from the very beginning and his lovey speech didn't really fit with the overall tone of the show. I kept asking myself where the joke was.

Did not get to watch Dollhouse, but my worries from the beginning about how it didn't sound that good are being reinforced by the vague reviews I'm hearing from others that did see it. Showed Dr. Horrible to the mother yesterday, who enjoyed it quite a bit (though she wasn't crazy about how it just ended), so weekend Joss fix = accomplished.

I'm at home atm for the long weekend. I should be leaving around 4 tomorrow to get back for a mock trial meeting Monday night, but I don't think that's happening, as BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY IS COMING TO SPEAK HERE. And since he's kinda one of my favorite guys of all time (you should hear me quote things like "Science rules" or burst into giggle fits anytime anyone says "Consider the following"), it wins. Must come up with a good excuse for not being able to come to MT, though I really shouldn't have to as I could make every single other meeting we've ever even proposed having. Still not looking forward to that in general. I'm sticking with the distancing myself plan, as then I can resist taking over and rewriting everyone's everything and can brush it off when since I didn't rewrite stuff, we get our asses kicked in two weeks.

Had lobster for the first time yesterday. Yum. It wasn't even good lobster (so says my dad; naturally I have no comparison), but I'm a huge fan of the richness (which is actually what Dad says was lacking in this one, so I can't wait to taste a good one). And scallops, though I think I've tasted them before. Fan of both, but the lobster more; I liked the scallop but it wasn't really anything new, delicious but not different from other seafoods like the lobster was in its richness. That's what my parents did for Valentine's Day, LOL, Dad bought lobster and Mom bought scallops and they cooked them up just in the kitchen and ate them at the table. I'd make a recession joke, but that's always what they've done, really, because they like homemade food. I trust nobody noticed my switching to my ancient, made because of a challenge I misread the rules for and so never actually entered it into, Valentine's NCIS icon, which was my only concession to the day.

[[There was at one point a whole huge thing here that I went back and added after finishing the rest of the post where I segued into Valentine's Day being my paternal grandmother's birthday and the whole situation with her and my dad and her health and such, but it became too long for this post and not the right attitude to then jump back to my sister being a socialite, so that will come in a separate post.]]

My sister is quite the social animal, I'm realizing. I mean, I knew that, but sort of forgot as with other people's vacations and such there wasn't much of it over Christmas. I come home Friday and she's having a Friday the 13th party with some 5 preteen girls (interestingly enough, two-maybe-three of whom have parents who teach in our school district; one of them math at the high school who actually recognized me despite my not ever having him nor spending more than one hour a day in the math building and none last year nor even ever having a conversation with the man, I don't think, which was somewhat weirding, though less so as he was quite nice). She spent Saturday afternoon out somewhere, and spent today making plans for people to go with her to BILL NYE OMG tomorrow. I mentioned to Mom, "Aren't you glad that you managed to skip this with your first two?" She responded with an emphatic yes.

I'm kind of jealous, though. Not of the socialization, as I tend to find that tiring, but idk, of the happiness she gleans from it? I do remember a time in elementary school when I loved going to parties and such, but it seems like people don't just get together and have fun just for the sake of it anymore. Since. . . hell, probably 8th grade, there was either a reason (a birthday or event) or (usually 'and') alcohol involved. Since none of my friends drank (most not at all, and never around me), it was like we didn't have that reason to get together that "mainstream teenagers" did, so we just didn't.

Or maybe they did all through high school and just didn't invite me. Tis a distinct possibility, as it's pretty easy to admit that Katie was the only person I was really close to. Which is why it really sucks that we aren't really talking anymore. I made some reference to something we used to do, one of our many collective quirks, and Mom asked if I'd talked to her recently, and I sort of scoffed and said no. Mom was like "What, are you mad at each other or something?" and I was really sort of idk, proud that I was able to say "Well, I am, idk about her." Because you know what? I am pissed that I made an effort to stay in touch and I wasn't getting any help with it, and I'm damn well allowed to be (/part of Alexandria's "not everything is your fault, Ms. Self Esteem Fail" campaign). She was always the more social of our pair, so she knows that my making the effort was an especial stretch for me, and yet I haven't heard from her since probably September. Mom says that she and my Aunt Beth didn't talk for most of college, and yet got back together enough that she's my godmother (though idk how much they've talked beyond notes in Christmas cards in the last few years).

And in completely different news, I'm pissed off that my dad/I didn't go ahead and buy NFL swag off of this Fox Sports website that was having this killer sale, as sometime today the sale died. It was killer. $2.50 hats, $7 shirts, $12 jerseys? We're talking easily 75% off. I would have worn Denver stuff every day (and actually bought a coat that fit me--as much as I lovelovelove my Denver Broncos coat, a good part because it was my Dad's and is huge and comfortable and you can settle down in it for the winter, because it was my dad's and is huge it doesn't trap body heat especially well when the wind blows like it does in Springfield because there's just too much air between you and it to try to keep warm under the bitter onslaught.

Figured out in a burst of figureoutedness (finding the word I want fail) that the headaches I've had all weekend are from caffeine withdrawal, LOLOL. At school, I've got a glass of soda (invariably at least 18oz, usually closer to 24+) with both lunch and dinner every day, unless I'm trying to be good and abstain, which usually lasts all of a day at most. Come here, and practically nothing. I was really pleasantly surprised that taking a Tylenol worked, though; I've got it in my head that NSAIDs don't work on me, which I think is the case because I take them so rarely, usually only when I'm actually in the midst of a full-out illness (and usually not even then unless I've got to suck it up to make it through school, as I'm of the mind to try to fever things done with quicker), so they can't relieve all the sick. When it was just a medium-strength headache and I grabbed some just because they were right next to me and I figured what the hell (and also "oh god, oh god, please do not be the beginnings of a migraine" as I've had surprisingly few lately *knock on everything solid within reach* and feel like I'm due), Tylenol could do it.

I really want a soda, LOL. Or anything, I suppose, but there's an empty can of Diet Coke over near me and the caffeine monster WANTS THAT and not the lukewarm last bits of a water bottle next to it.

/test of the emergency broadcast system email posting. Chances are this will have to be cleaned up as idk if it will handle coding or anything, but I'm hopeful. Could be handy, as I tend to log in to my email on any computer I'm on for more than a few minutes (in a computer lab or something), but logging into LJ is rarer and that extra step is a deterrent from posting. Though the fact that oddly, the Firefox built in spellcheck doesn't appear to be working right now is similarly a deterrent. Idk what's up there.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
O. M. F. G.

Marburg hemorrhagic fever, imported case, UNITED STATES

LOL at how they retrospectively diagnosed it, though.

Atm, I'm in the first floor of the biomedical sciences building while my gel runs upstairs because I've got a shitload of work and no time to do it. I've been getting maybe 4 hours of sleep each of the last three days, which doesn't make me happy as with my 8 and 9 am classes, I was trying to be in bed by midnight. Yeah, that worked until I got, idk, actual homework.

And now I'm swamped, between the lab and mock trial right now. The former is new and weird. Though this is only my third day working in there, so it's understandable, and I am really getting the hang of things because I know what I'm doing, just not where everything is, LOL; keeping the notebook is the hard bit--I'm not sure how much/what to write out. As there's a large continuum of detailedness in procedure, especially since it's all written out for me already as standards and I only really have to mark down changes I make (different buffers, annealing temperatures for the PCR, etc.) And I'll definitely have enough to actually write it up when I'm done, but I'm not sure how much the supervisor wants in terms of that kiddish bullshit regarding actually enumerating every item you ever even think about touching in the materials section, etc.

MT is. . . interesting. We're just prepping every witness just in case, which is what I'd been advocating forever, but now we have enough people to do it. I'm pretty much pissed at most of the people, though, as they just jumped in on Sunday so they could get to go with us to Columbia for the competition. And worried, as I've never heard any of them do anything mock trial-y. And one of them not even talk, really. I'm worried about him the most, as he's not even in Phi Alpha Delta (the pre-law fraternity that's sponsoring the MT team) and. . . doesn't really strike me as intelligent. I mean, at all. But as a result of this last-minute thing, we don't have an overall case strategy, nobody's working with each other to coordinate examinations (because sometimes you've got to make sure somebody says something earlier so you can get in what you want later), etc. So we're pretty much going to get our asses kicked, which I severely dislike. Because I'm good at this mock trial stuff, but I'm having to spend all my time just trying to get everybody (or even some of everybody) in the same room at the same time. We had both of the other lawyers and one of my two definitely-going-to-be-used witnesses not show up to the meeting on Sunday, so I can only hope that they didn't just quit on me or something. I don't understand why people here think they don't have to make any kind of comittment--it's only since the president of PAD intervened for me and started browbeating people that anybody would show up, since I've got no incentive/disincentive to enforce to ensure attendance. But seriously? Nobody seems to get that you've got to make the meeting times fit, you can't just say "oh, I've got work, can't show"--it's called asking off, seeing as how MT'll be over in a few weeks, it's not like it's going to be forever.

And I've got my microbiology test tomorrow that I'm going to fail since I still can't get the book (they're out at the bookstore; they offered to order me one, but I'll be damned if I'm paying the new price much less also the "having to ship it in" fee that I've heard they tack on)

And a psychology test that I'm going to spend all of 5 minutes looking over stuff for because I'm fairly certain I can take this class's final right now and pull at least a 97% but still adds to the stress

And chemistry lab (and thus in-lab quiz and writeup) tomorrow.

And journal entries due for Hero and Quest reflecting over material I haven't actually read all of. These being that which I was up until 1 and then from 3:30-6ish doing two weeks worth of last night (and it actually did take me that long, because of both the ADD from hell that's decided to be a bitch this semester simply because my doctor moved to Wisconsin so I've got no way of getting my meds for it reupped again), but it turns out that even though we didn't have class at all the third week, we've still got to do one.

And to add insult to injury, I was all excited about lunch today because it was some French theme and one of the counters was going to be fruit and cheese dessert. Which I thought might mean decent fruit (berries and such instead of the standard apple/orange/pear/banana/grapefruit rotating selection they've got of fresh, and nasty mushy sugary frozen/canned other fruits). With no interest in dinner (chicken strips and mashed potatoes/macaroni and cheese in both dining halls, blech--since they're for some reason killer popular, that's all it would have been at all the counters and in both places on the same day, which just seems stupid to me), that was going to be it for me for the day, but no. That dining place has a power outage.

And the chairs that I'm in in the computer lab have the most worthless backs in the history of chairs. Which would be okay if you just didn't use them, like stools; painful but doable. But no. The seat is slanted backwards so as to tip you back towards the back, which then leans so far back that I'd probably fall asleep if I stayed that way for more than a few seconds.


On a less-whiny (okay, still whiny, but different topic) note, House last night. How long after all the hoopla was that last scene supposed to have taken place? They didn't establish any kind of time passage, I think, which is fail. Because really? Not so much with the sexing after all that medical shit goes down. (Plus, erm, not really a fan of the 14.)
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
Spoilers for 1/23's BSG )

I've really got to pay better attention to these. I think my ADD has progressively gotten worse, as TV's just something I can't do anymore. I'm always also checking my email and playing a game and eating a bowl of oatmeal, etc., etc. and with shows like BSG, you really need to be watching closer than that. It works fine for stuff like Psych, but I find that even with House or ER, people (or the characters) wi'll mention something that happened last week and I won't know what they're talking about even though I just watched it.

Spoilers for Psych )

Beta'd some fic recently. That was fun. Yet always agonizing--I always want to point out as many things as I think I can help with, but I don't want to make it seem like the fic is bad or make too many suggestions because I think it's worded awkwardly or something that are changing things that are just part of their style. It was (presumably--I just sort of assumed as the author writes femslash and the main characters appeared from the first chapter I read to be these two) Kim/Olivia of SVU, which I've never seen. Frankly, I was so pissed with the casting of Kim (the actress is barely old enough to have feasibly graduated from law school, much less worked in DC and then be assigned to Manhattan's elite Special Victims' Unit) that I haven't paid much attention to her character, but I'll definitely have to now, especially if my betaing skills are retained past that first chapter. (I may have scared her away.)
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
OMFG, Tuesday's NCIS. Could it have been more gay? Answer: no. Fail at how I remember none of the details of it, though, just that there were looks and dialogue and ghey. Must rewatch, but stuff is crazy lately with the beginning of classes and I'm pretty much booked all night tonight, which I'm not really excited about. I mean, none if it's intense stuff, it's actually recreation-esque: dinner, then a pre-law frat meeting, then bingo in our lobby, then exercising, but the simple fact that my schedule is packed from 6-10 and I should be going to bed pretty soon after that (I'm not yet used to the fact that I've got to get up early every day this semester, not just 8am T/Th and 11 or 12 every other day, and I already was late to my 8 on Wednesday) means I feel like I've got no time.

Figured out my face thing, when it gets all red and burned like. I don't think, now, that all my incidences of this are the same, as the itching-inflammation precursors and symptoms don't seem to match the rarer pain-inflammation-sensitivity ones. The itching ones, though, are a combination of benzoyl peroxide (the acne medicine) and the cold, I think. Definite on the former, unsure on the latter, but it would make sense as to why I can use the exact same acne stuff day after day for ages and all of a sudden it will randomly give me a face like Rudolph's nose.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Criminal Minds)
An internal intelligence assessment, obtained by The Associated Press on Wednesday, says the high visibility of the event, the presence of dignitaries and the significance of swearing in the country's first black president make the inauguration vulnerable to attacks.
Feds say inauguration attractive terrorist target - Yahoo! News

I bet we paid them a lot of money to come up with that profundity, too. File this one under "no duh", joint FBI and HHS task force.

And in other news, OMFG, I just made one of the most delicious dinners I've ever eaten totally by accident. It was one of those spontaneous, "What do I have in the fridge? Ooh! this will be good added in" things: just fresh broccoli all chopped up and softened in the microwave for a minute with spaghetti sauce my dad made (that was actually not one of his better batches, as the spices were wrong), that I ended up adding a bit of corn, a cooked and chopped up egg white and half a slice of fat free sharp cheddar cheese to. Warm it all up, mix it together, and I tried to fix the spices a bit--the thing was that Dad made the sauce for the meatballs he also made that were both delicious and sort of spicy, so to compensate the sauce itself was rather bland as the meatball spicy leeched out, but I got mine from the non-meatball batch, thus insufficiently spiced. I figured it needed more oregano, but though I'm a fan of that in the spaghetti in small amounts, by itself not so much, so when I picked up the jar and sniffed it, I decided a no on that one. So instead of trying to make it really spaghetti-saucey, I threw in some cumin and more garlic (because garlic:me is like butter:Paula Deen--everything needs more) AND SOMEHOW IT WAS AMAZING. And then just to make it more food, because it looked kinda small (and because I watched Top Chef at the gym and decided to make it into a blintz even though I've got no idea what a blintz really is, because this felt like one) I split the mixture in half and wrapped each bit up in a lettuce leaf that folded up all nicely like a cool wrap/sandwich(/blintz). But since it was Dad's sauce and the philosophy in our house with spices is that there is no measuring involved, there's going to be no way to recreate it.

Still. Man. Delish. Kinda dampened by the fact that before I ate it, I had to run to the bathroom so I stuck the whole wrapped thing into the microwave on half power for a minute while I ran there and back, and though the lettuce stayed decently crispy and the insides stayed warm, it was enough heat to cause the vegetable cooking phenomenon of doom: everything gets watery. And because it was all wrapped up and in a dish, I didn't notice until I carried it back to my room and picked it up to eat. While sitting on my bed. For whatever reason, I'd pulled over this section of newspaper to set the dish on, and thank god for that because otherwise there'd have been reddish tomatoey water all over my sheets. So flavor still magnificent, presentation got killed a bit there.

And in other, other news: DIE, UTERUS. That is all.
commotiocordis: (Jack/Ianto)
Well, shit. Panel warns biological attack likely by 2013 Self-fulfilling prophecy? Please to not be being in effect. Because this is the Armageddon scenario--back before cars and affordable (well, you know) plane flights and people jetting back and forth every day, we might have been able to survive it, but these days? Get something airborne and contageous enough and it's everywhere before anyone realizes it's out there. Nuclear weapons can't touch this. Add that to the report from the CDC that came out today stating that their pandemic drills revealed major supply issues, and let's face it. We're screwed.

"The United States should be less concerned that terrorists will become biologists and far more concerned that biologists will become terrorists," the report states.

Yeah. You know it, United States. That means you better work harder at keeping me happy. Federal government, I think that's going to take making me a tax-exempt entity, giving me an honorary BS so I can skip on to medical school (which you will then pay for), and hooking me up with a senior adviser position in the Obama administration. Now, bitches. LOL.


I keep hearing the old cellphone I use as an alarm giving me it's "I'm really, really close to dead" tone, but I can't find it. Argh.

A day (or maybe two, idk) later:

Jeeze, I'm backing up on posts. I've got one still half-written in my draft folder from Saturday, this one from Tuesday or so. Fail.

Note to self: Thursday, 12/4/08 = another uber!sensitive face allergy attack thing. Definitively noticed around noon, itching (not just pain this time) got really bad at 1. Around 4am, put on Duac gel, entire face. Also wearing 10% wool sweater (since about 7:30). Wore acrylic yarn knit hat in morning. Took Dipenhydramine 25mg at 3:20, shower (made redness worse, prolly because used the hard, chlorinated spray of warm water on face instead of scratching), then another Dipenhydramine at 3:55.

So of course this happens on the day of the initiation dinner to the pre-law frat, as well as the trivia night in the student union. Plus, I've not yet gymmed. Meaning that of course, it doesn't happen on a day where all I do is go to the dining hall and then the gym (or even a day when I'm home and just leave to hit the gym), but one of my 8-4 (3, this time, as the genetics lab final was quick) classes days where I have three separate semi-social outings afterwards and have to walk around the whole time with this mostly bright freaking red face. No kidding here, we're not talking a bit pink and irritated--my face is red. With the occasional white blotch of normal skin--two that I noticed when I glanced in the mirror as I passed, about quarter-sized on the right and dime on the left cheek (and they're not even symmetrical, to add insult to injury).
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
Oh, and didn't mention. I'm home.

Heat blanket, how I've missed you. Except I think I may be having some kind of sensory issue, because I've noticed this several times lately: I don't feel heat. In my entire body. My mind registers the signal and cognitively knows that it's warm because I get those pinpricky bits of sweat under my eyes. But my limbs, torso, etc. are not transmitting the warm sensation. I'm not cold, but I should be quite toasty; I'm under the heat blanket (OMG, how I've missed you) that I've used and been uncomfortably warm under before (though of course there's the chance that it simply no longer works) and it's cranked all the way up and all.

The family bought cake as a sort of welcome home + sorry last time you were home it sucked (beause of the whole 'everybody being somewhere else' thing), and it's 5 pounds of chocolate deliciousness. Holy shit, this is a large cake.

Ride home was uneventful, save that I got to play with Ray's (friend of [livejournal.com profile] bleakone who was along for half the ride) iPhone for a few minutes, which was cool as I'd never gotten to mess around with one before. And it was rainy and wet, so Rachel's wipers got a workout.

I left my keys in Springfield, though, so I'll have to bum a set if I wish to go anywhere. Including to the gym, which we've got to get my sister's membership to transferred to me (as dad canceled mine before we knew that I could go to the one near school, and even though he tried to un-cancel it before it technically ran out, they couldn't do it) tomorrow so I can work out. Because Alexandria on no workout? Something no one wants to see.

Got a 50/50 on my last genetics paper, which is win. Got used as the example for the class, as well (which freaked me out a bit, because he pointed out one bit as "the bare minimum, here" and I was all "OMG, IFAIL.") which is impressive--I'm all about looking good in front of this guy, as he's both my advisor and I'm fairly certain on the pre-med committee. So I'm a little less worried about the test that I took in there today, which I knew absolutely nothing on. Or, you know, in that way in which it felt okay early on, but then you mark the ones you're not sure about and then go back to those and spend the last however much of your time on the ones you absolutely can't figure out, so you leave feeling like an idiot because the hard ones are last in your mind. So idk. But from a sheer how much time I put into this section perspective, I'm going to suck. Spent Thursday night fighting off a migraine instead of studying (I was more concerned with not letting it progress into a full blown migraine that would carry over to the test the next day and thus prevent me from performing at all as I'd be too busy, you know, puking) and managed to miss 3 lectures since the last test from the residence hall conference once, getting hung up upstairs in lab once, and just being a lazyarse once; therefore, good chance it won't be pretty.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Criminal Minds)
It feels like there's some kind of a three or six or someodd-week window (they always give the parents some amount of time that you're not supposed to visit your kids for that reason) where things are supposed to click and you're supposed to adjust to being away from home and I somehow missed it. It's not even like I was particularly close to my family in the first place; yeah, I love them and all, but I spent most of my time when I was at home in my room by myself. It kinda scares me, you know, in the ferocity of this. . . it's not homesickness, really, so much as it is hate-thereness, I think. I've got no idea. I can't articulate why I dislike it there so much (sure, I can bitch about whatever issue is currently pissing me off, but it's more a general loathing of the entire situation), but to sort of put things into perspective, I checked my Outlook calendar that I've got all my class times and everything typed into this afternoon and had a panic attack over the prospect of going back there. Not even just worked myself into one, which I'll do if I'm upset and let it compound, but it was sudden--there wasn't even a semi-conscious thought process of "Oh, man, schedule. I've got class on Monday. That means I've got to leave home. And go back to school. I hate school! *freaks*", it just hit--and it lasted a long time. And even after the actual attack was over, I was mentally shaky and feeling all self-destructive and bad.

So that's no fun. Break in general, though good at the beginning, got pretty not-enjoyable. As Dad got a call from bum Aunt Chris (re: bum--see the last time I made a post where things happened almost exactly like this) saying that Grandma had her second stroke this week (our reaction: OMGWTF THANKS FOR TELLING US AFTER #1) and somebody misrepresented/misunderstood/whatever the gravity of the situation (we sort of think that Chris needed a break from helping Grandma extra over the last few days when one of these last strokes mussed up her mobility, and she let Dad believe that things were really bad so he'd come down and help out. My opinion? You're living in your mother's house, driving her car, supplementing your measly sales income with her social security and your father's pension; bitchplease, shut up and help out your mother) and it essentially boiled down to Mom spending all of Friday writing out lesson plans for next week in case she had to get a sub for a funeral and Dad and Tyler leaving within about an hour of the initial phone call to go down there.

She's doing a lot better, Dad says--if I've said it once, I've said it a million times: if I inherit anything from this woman (besides, erm, breasticles), please let it be her stroke resiliency. I have no idea how many she's had, but she shuffles around for a bit (worse than usual--I think one of the early ones screwed her gait up, because she's shuffled more or less since I can remember noticing), has some short term memory loss (she loses a couple of days around the stroke that I'm not sure she ever gets back, and loses larger chunks of time/people transiently for a short period but does get that back), but that's it. You know, I think. It's hard to tell when I see her as rarely as I do what's stroke and what's just oldperson.

It was weird that afternoon. I was all lol!emotional vulnerability. I'm usually the stoic one in things like this (not even because I'm trying to or anything, just because I'm fairly cool with death), but was all . . . not. I think (self-psychoanalysis time!) I was picking up on the emotionally charged atmosphere with my dad freaking out (he really thought he needed to get down there quick until he called right before leaving to tell Chris that he was coming down and his mom answered the phone, LOL) plus my subconsciously being a selfish bitch pissed that my first visit home was getting screwed up by this by itself, and more so by Dad and Tyler leaving, plus the whole situation being reflective of how I've been more fearful lately because my dad's diabetes got bad (and by bad, I mean good--his doctor was happy with his control, but her happy meant he was having lows a lot more often. With diabetes, high kills your organs and you over time, lows kill you overnight, especially once you become less sensitive to them as everyone does; then it takes a glucose of say 40 to give you the shaky warning--or you lose the sick feeling altogether and skip straight to the disorientation, like Dad now does--that 70 once did, even though the setpoint of unconsciousness at 30 hasn't changed, you've just got less warning to do something about it) right before I left, and how I feel out of the loop of the whole family everything, and the fact that (as evidenced by the later-occurring/aforementioned panic attack) I seem to be an emotional wuss.

But yeah, he called and Grandma picked up, which surprised me because, you know, I sort of figure post stroke -> hospital. But then again, bumaunt earned the bum title from last stroke Grandma had last year when she didn't make her go to the hospital (Grandma didn't realize that there are things you can do for strokes now because I think her last one was a while back, so she just made an appointment with her GP for Monday morning), so perhaps not that surprising--I've yet to hear the medical story. From my side of the conversation (just listening to Dad talk to her), it sounded like she was doing pretty well. So then it became more of an "I have the weekend, if she's had two strokes in a week things can't be good no matter how well she bounces back, so I'd better go and be with her while she's still there mentally and before she doesn't bounce back as well one of these times", which I totally understand is still filled with that urgency for him--he's mentioned before that one of his biggest regrets about when his dad died is that he didn't get down there until after he was only in-and-out (and mostly out) mentally.

Dad's hoping to leave really early Sunday to get back around noon (yeah right, but hopefully) so we have a few hours to hang out before I've got to leave. Still not like I'd hoped--we were going to go fishing on Friday, and then he and mom had signed up for a canoe trip together all day Saturday, and I was supposed to be able to do about a bazillion things I'd planned and didn't get to because I've been feeling off.

Weekend update: Alexandria Edition

All this hooplah on Friday. Didn't do much else. Bummed around playing Sims: Castaway Stories (beat that in two days, somewhat disappointingly, and I'm not crazy about the gameplay for the open ended bit as it feels much more limited than the Life Stories one did), went to Sam's with Mom, exercised, had a nice feta, corn, roasted chicken, and Italian dressing salad for dinner (it's crazy--salad's all I eat at school, and yet throw in the chicken and the feta and the dressing, none of which are available there, and it's a totally different and significantly more delicious animal), did some more computer bumming, went to bed.

Saturday: was planning on getting up early to workout at 8, do the yoga class at the gym at 9 (as I've been paying them for several years for free group classes included, and when do they finally get classes at my location? About three weeks after I leave), and then leave at 10 to go see Obama at noon, followed by further shopping (the rest having been done with Mom Friday night) for the church family night chili dinner, which I'd then go down to around 4 to start stuff cooking (some eight pounds of pasta, mostly, as well as prepping plain spaghetti sauce and salad) for dinner at 6. The first two didn't happen because I was up until 5 or 6 playing around on the computer. The third didn't happen because I was getting ready to go and turned on the TV and heard that there were some thousands and thousands of people that had been down there waiting for hours already and the gates didn't even open for another 30 minutes, and that if I went, the time spent looking for somewhere to park (even in the closest Metro carpark; almost especially so, as it's the only one that even approaches the county, so it's always packed) would singlehandedly offset any benefit from Obama's energy plan. Went to the Jewish Community Center's costume sale instead, and picked up a bunch of stuff for Dad's classes for cheap. They had pretty much a whole set for doing Beauty and the Beast that I really wanted, but it wasn't exactly what he was looking for with his kids doing Shakespeare and all. Got a really nice dress, though, that I think is perfect for mideval stuff, as well as a flouncy underskirt that I'm saving for my colonial costume for taking Kaci to the Feast of the Hunter's Moon next year with the middle school Fiddlers.

Then I ran about shopping for church dinner food some more because the costuming took longer than I expected (I was looking for "the auditorium" instead of it being inside the auditorium inside the community center), and finally got back and did the food. Served the Catholics in my Obama t-shirt and got more pleasant comments than I expected, especially considering that it's almost always just old people that come to these things (which sucks, as it's family night and there's never really any family mingling because the old people all just stick together in the same groups and tend to exclude anybody that's not been in the church since before the last ice age--I mean, my parents have been going there since before I was born, and yet 90% of their conversations have to do with church stuff way before that). There were really no comments at all besides a handful of people asking if I went and a few that I knew--Rick, my volleyball boss and my friend Celeste's mom-- and one other random guy actually articulating support. Not even Father Jim had anything really to say save some remarks about how it seemed the entire city was there (but then again, I've been told he doesn't talk nearly as much anymore after he had a stroke a bit after I left, which sucks, both because I really like him and because he's always been v. v. softspoken and shy to begin with), which was a tad disappointing because I'd have loved to go three rounds on how the Catholic policy on birth control is an abject violation of their claim to honor and preserve the sanctity of life with somebody there.

Thing that made me angry: 8 people signed up to bring chili, 4 did because fail--even when my mom and the mother of a schoolmate of Kaci's brought some without having been included in the 8 count, we still ran out of all the "normal kinds" very quickly with only about a spoonful of ground turkey chili (that I think had been left for gone, but I managed to scrape it out because that was the one I wanted), and a little of each a v. hot white chili and a v. mild gluten-free chili left when the noodles line had finished and I got over there to see what was left, less than 20 minutes after mass ended. We had plenty of spaghetti and sauce left, though, so nobody totally missed out.

Then exercised, then hit up a couple of stores on the way home (the Farmer's Market because I wanted to check on pumpkin prices and because fruits/veggies yum, Big Lots because mom told me to grab some extension bar thing that I got the wrong one of--prolly because the best I can describe it as is "extension bar thing"--followed by Walgreens because I had thought that they had free after rebate stuff that I wanted, but it turns out that it was last month), then got mom to glob my hair up with henna while watching Andromeda dvds followed by the opening sketch of SNL (assuming Palin wasn't in any of the rest), then spent the last several hours (literally) writing this.

Whew. Caught up, more or less. Far more detail than anyone cares about, but ehh.

There's a list of things I want to do tomorrow, including going bowling, to this Natural Living Expo, carving a pumpkin, and tie-dying a shirt (all of which sound sort of random but are in fact quite easily possible), but I've got to leave before 7 and Kaci's got two soccer games tomorrow. After having (missing, actually, as nobody realized) one yesterday, because they're making up for the fact that they were rained out some 3 weeks already this season--I tell you, she got signed up for this city team rather than play with the school like she used to or the church like I used to, and they're a bunch of wusses. Both the city (not even our city, LOL, but one a bit farther West that we tend to mock a bit; I have no idea why that one, but somehow a bunch of her old teammates from the school team that didn't get going this year for whatever reason all went out there) and the school teams are, though the latter will at least play in the rain. I have pictures from when I played for the church of us playing in a freaking ice storm. (I assume--the playing happened, and pictures tended to happen, though I couldn't tell you where they'd be.) Us Catholic sports girls took our shit seriously.

Concluding thoughts (at least until I come up with more):
I'm almost painfully thirsty and have been for the last 500 words or so, but don't feel like getting out of bed until I'm done and am about to go to sleep.

The plastic wrap extension to my shower cap holding my henna'd hair in (too much hair, LOL, especially when thickened by goop) keeps sliding down and covering half of my eyes. I can't get it to stay up.

My laptop has another screen glitchy bit (this one's just a dark spot that looks like it's just a drop of scum on the screen until you get close and realize that it's underneath). I found out, though, that there's a place only about 20 minutes away from here that does warranty repair, so I won't even have to ship it in.
Best Buy was trying to tell me over the summer when I first asked that I had no warranty at all on this thing since I didn't buy theirs and had to give it to their Geek Squad to fix (which they couldn't do, as this is a manufacturer only replacement) for mucho dinero, the thieving arses.

I iz headached. Off and on the entire time I've been here. But my Springfieldhumidity-induced acne is almost totally gone after only two or so days. It's weird, considering that St. Louis is the place that people joke "It's not the heat, it's the humidity" about, because of all the rivers, not Springfield.

Speaking of weather, *temperaturegasm*. God, it's beautiful. You turn the air conditioning on in the car if the sun's shining on you, but I ran to get something out of the car around 10:15ish before SNL and was hustling because it was chilly and the grass was quite cold. It's camping weather--it might be a tad too cold to be really comfortable at night outside (at least for me, as I've got a very range of comfort I can fall asleep in--even if it's totally fine during the day, the same temperature at night and I'll be far too frozen to sleep), but it's the exact kind of crisp cool that would make sitting in front of a fire just amazing.

I'm falling asleep while I write this. Holy crap, I started typing this easily 2 hours ago. Nonstop typing, pretty much (at least for the last hour of it since I first really looked at the clock), not even the normal "type some, fool around playing a game/checking email/whatever, type some more, etc." thing.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
I have been mucho pissy all day. And I know the exact reason. Dumb ass cohab types who've decided that my room is the place to hang out now. I mean seriously. I related the conversation from last night about how everybody could just keep hanging out in here playing loud YouTube videos because she only had dance in the morning. I got maybe 3 hours of sleep. On top of a similar amount the night before. And now I'm ready to bite someone everyone's head off.

Doesn't help that at my genetics lab today, my "lab partner" just sat there and looked dumb for the entire thing. She'd only do something when I explicitly gave her instructions/handed her the micropipette and said "Suck. Drop." And of course, somehow even that got screwed up, because our titrations were not the right color. Too much of the serum added, we think. (Guess who did the micropipetting for that part? Not me, let's say.)

But I ran back to the room in my 30 minute gap or so before my non-West Wing class (we're finally starting to watch it next week, he says), and Chelsea's in there taking a nap. I was fucking furious. I really wanted to be a bitch and "accidentally" wake her up, but that thought only occurred to me after I'd left. She keeps me up all hours of the night (okay, not past 1 really, but kept me from getting any work done for those same hours, so I had to force myself to stay up even later for homework), saying that it's okay because she doesn't have classes, and then has the nerve to take a nap in the middle of the afternoon. When, of course, when I want to take a nap after being in class from 8 until 4, no such luck because the freaking party's back in my room.

Add that to the fact that when I got in today, she accosts me about there somehow being some of my hair on the edge of her bed. Umm, yeah. Because I decided to pull out some of my hair by the roots and rub my feet along the carpet until I'd amassed enough static cling to maliciously place the hair right there on the edge of her bed. WTF? What does she expect me to respond to that? "Umm, sorry?" is what she got. You know what, whatever. Maybe she'd get a different response if it wasn't her fault I've had maybe 7 hours of sleep over the past two days she'd get more. . . idk, sympathy (though prolly not), but for now? Fuck you, ma'am. It's not like there's even any purpose to you or your cronies (currently Breanna, one of our suitemates) being in here atm--you're not even talking to each other really, just looking at people's Facebooks. Don't you have homework? God knows I do, and I can't fucking get any of it done when I'm having to live my life by your goddamned social schedule. I knew I loved it when she left for the weekend like she's done twice so far, but I didn't really realize how much until she came back this week. It's pretty obvious the roommate honeymoon has worn off.

Must remember to bring my gym class pre-test lab worksheet by the grad student teacher guy's mailbox, as I'm losing points for forgetting it on Wednesday. I meant to bring it by that day, but didn't. I've still got to find the thing, actualmente.

Stupid weightgainage means mucho leg pains of late. Hips, mostly. And now my left pinky, though probably unrelated--it only started when I began typing this, so I think I'm just holding it strangely.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
Re: the Denver game last night Sunday (because fail at hitting post). This Subway commercial is oddly prophetic, innit? I didn't actually see the game, which sucks (I mean, how often is a coach gutsy enough to go for the 2-point conversion rather than take the guaranteed tie with the extra point), but from hearing everybody complain about it (including all the football recappers on TV), this seems to have been the scenario.

And LOL at what's the top listed "most popular" story on Yahoo atm: Doctors say leg pain can signal deadly blood clot. This is part of an ad campaign for House's season premiere, I am thinking. Kay, prolly not, but still. Made me smile when I opened up the news page.

And these bits are from today:
Dream of cracktasticness.

So, evidently my subconscious wants to sleep with Jackie Onassis. Slash is doing so. Because in dream, I ended up having to tell her kids that Kennedy was dead (though it was nowtimes, she was young like it was thentimes) because we were all relationshippy. There was comforting. Not the sex type, though. Very platonic, except in that way that you just know that it was not. And then I ended up not getting around to telling my brother because I was doing something else (I think bringing back food from random cabinets in the symbolic dining hall that was actually off of a landing in between flights of stairs), but then I was in my kitchen and I hear this random loud sob. My initial response is "Oh, somebody told him," because he's sensitive about this people dying type thing. But then he runs up the stairs, shirtless, holding his hands out cupped in front of him. In the hands? Potato chips. The plain, flat, translucent with grease, white Lays kind. My dreamself's next thought is "They must be hot or something," but I hadn't gotten around to wondering why he didn't just drop them when [livejournal.com profile] bleakone's phone call woke me up.

More crazy fast weight gain. I'm getting worried that it's some kind of hormonal/metabolic thing, because it's now up to 10lbs. Water weight from having access to soda at every meal?

Random observation: I just glanced down at my left arm (because it itched) and there's a significant sized pockmark/hole by my antecubital vein from the last time I gave blood. Like a dent in the skin. Fail, healing.

No real thoughts yet on the House episode. Except no flirting with patients, Remy. That's not cool. Because I refuse to allow myself to ship doctor/patient unless they're recurring or otherwise notable (read: played by an actor/actress I like), and so that's a waste of the network's miniscule allowed homosexual flirtage quota.
commotiocordis: (QPicard)
Went bowling again last night. Fun. I know I used to be better than this, though, LOL. I can't get a good balance between a ball that's light enough that it doesn't hurt me to throw (as I tend to pull things and twist things while bowling a lot) but one that's heavy enough that when I hit the pins right down the center, they actually all fall down.

I feel vaguely foolish right now, as there's nothing else on TV so I'm watching the volleyball game that's happening in another building less than 500 feet away. But also quite superior, as I'm able to watch the game (or really, listen, as I'm computering) while having the internets and air conditioning and the cocoa rice krispies that I nicked at brunch. It's a tournament, so I might go down at some point and watch one if I have nothing else to do, as I think it's all weekend. Prolly not, though, as the allure of sitting on my bed rather than on uncomfortable bleachers is too great.

It appears that I've misplaced my glasses, which is worrysome. If I knew that they were in my room somewhere, it'd be different, but as I also take them off when I work out (in a different building) and then possibly leave them in my pocket or something while I ride my bike back (meaning falling out is possible), they could really be anywhere.

Still no debit card, thanks credit union people, which means I can't yet join the pre-law frat for mock trial like I need to.

I'm 3/5 of the way to the freshman 15, which is very disturbing. And I'm feeling it, arthritis pain-wise, so we're working on curbing that. Problem is that I can't really account for it--I'd much prefer it if I had been all "LOL, caloriez!" lately, because then not only would I know why it happened, I'd know how to fix it. And as a result, I've gotten rather paranoid, all "Did they mix up the lines and maybe it's not really diet soda in the fountain?" and "Maybe that raspberry salad dressing isn't really only 15 calories!" and such.

Genetics test yesterday was not fun. There was a big long list of dates and events to memorize--some of these events had names associated with them. The instructions said to be able to match dates and events, I was able to do so. Problem was, about half of that matching section was events and names. When it gave me the event, I could tell you the year, but when that wasn't what they were asking, it did me no good. I'm not excited about the score for that exam.

Got up at 8 to take a practice L.S.A.T. (which I had to punctuate to stop spellcheck from changing to "last", grr) this morning, just for fun. I love the logic games section. In that I've always found those things fun. But man, do I spend a long time thinking about them! I'll really have to work on that. I had barely more than half the answers down before time was up on that section (though I'd worked on more problems than that, I only totally finished up/selected a final answer for 13/24). But I finished all the other sections quite early, so I marked where I was on the logic games section and went back and finished it with my extra time; I didn't know that there was no guessing penalty, so I had left the remaining 11 blank, which was quite conducive to going back.

Therefore, I've got three scores that I pulled out to look at, LOL: the score I got leaving the back 11 of the logic section blank, the score I got with the logic section completed (which required extending the time by about 12 minutes), and the score I would get assuming I guessed on the back 11 and got 3 (1/4 ish) correct. The third one is probably the most accurate, but it's the one for which I'm guessing on the actual L.S.A.T. index for (as I didn't know that guessing had no penalty until after I looked up the index for my other two raw scores--I just figured it out based on a little bit of math to find its place in the middle of the other two. Since it's bell curved, that isn't actually right, but should be close--I checked it on the raw score/index chart for another test that the two scores I had data for matched up with, so it probably varies no more than +/- 1.)

I'm satisfied. Never having seen the test before (not even knowing the structure of it, actually--I walked in completely blind) and with no prep, I got a 164 (with time, no guessing)/ 173 (without time)/ 170 (with time and guessing), 170 being my more accurate number as to what I'd actually get. Which, according to the 1998-2001 numbers (idk how much they apply now, but it's the best I can find), is the 98.21 percentile.

So, erm, damn. Might be having to go to law school. I don't anticipate scoring nearly as well on the MCATs, as they're so much more technical with the science and so. This was very verbal and logic based, which are skills of mine.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
OMG beautiful weather today. Downright chilly most of the morning--add the windchill from bike riding and I was goosebumpy through all of my polisci class. Which is interesting. The class, not the goosebumps. It's one of those ones where all the material is interesting, but you come out of it looking over your notes and wondering what exactly there is in there to be tested on. Plus, the teacher's still trying to pretend she's from Oklahoma. Seriously. I recorded part of her lecture today, so I'm going to go though that and pick out some of the strikingly not-Oklahomian bits to share.

I'm in the top floor lobby atm, and not only did (in the few minutes it took for me to run back to my room, pop a bag of popcorn, and come back) somebody take my spot in the cushy chair alcove, now two other people (boyfriend and girlfriend, I'm assuming) have come into the same alcove to powow. Idk what they're doing--the girl padded in in her pajamas, bringing two bottles of water (vodka?) and the guy came off the elevator, and now they're just talking. Nothing wrong with that, I mean, but don't you have rooms? And at 11pm?

I am quite annoyed currently with the network stuff here. They're all "don't go over your weekly bandwidth or you'll drop down to dial up speeds!1!one!!" Umm, that's what I'm getting anyway. (And still managed to get within 400mb of the limit a few days ago, LOL). It's horrible. The inconsistency is the worst part--I'll be going 80 bytes per second for a while, and then it'll jump up to over 1mb/sec for a while, then back down to where it usually hangs out at 20-30kb/s. No idea how I got the killer speed, no idea what made it go the snail speed--all on Megaupload at pretty much the same time of day, so that's not it. And it's not even the wireless--this is on the wired connection. The wireless is more consistently fast (300kb/s ish in the basement lobby) if you're actually in the wireless zone--I can pick up the wireless from my room since this lobby has it, but the connection is spotty so it's not as quick.

[Edit: later, 1:20 am ish? I'm getting between 750k/s and 1mb/s back in the room on the wired. *sigh*]

Food here still doesn't make me happy. Omlette bar days do, because they've got whole eggs that I can separate myself (LOL at how I have to do it) in the hall that's practically in my building and a bucket o' egg white in the one that's on the way to most of my classes. But due to my scheduling, I rarely get down there for breakfast, which is sad. Most other days, the only thing I can count on is the salad bar (which tends to suck at the one near my classes--wilted lettuce, still-frozen vegetables, etc.; I only hit that one on T/Th for lunch, though, as other times I'm either in class during the meal times or near the closer one) and I have to bring my own fat free italian down because they only have one fat free dressing (raspberry--it's good, but you get tired of it quickly because it's a pretty flat flavor). There's a grill with burgers and stuff every day, and then some random fried meat substance most of the time for the main course (pork fritters today, etc.), and then one random thing that's usually not something I'll eat.

Even with the good weather today, the gym has not become any more tolerable. If there's more than one other person on the tiny row of treadmills, it's too loud to hear whatever episode of something I've put on my MP3 player (I wrap the velcro arm band around the handlebar thing to sort of prop up the screen so I can see it, though I've got to keep adjusting it the entire time because it tends to flop around because I can't quite get it to velcro on tightly enough), and you can never hear/see the TV. The latter mostly because my glasses are too wide for my face, idk how, and I can't get the ear pieces to sort of go back inwards, so if my face gets at all sweaty, they start sliding down.

Speaking of TV. O HELLZ YES, DENVER BRONCOS. Thank you for Monday night, sirs. But OMG, I didn't realize that we let Elam go. The new kicker's not bad (by that I mean he didn't miss last night), but IL Jason Elam. He's 38 and still the best kicker in the league. Plus, he's been playing pretty much my entire Denver-watching career, so he's one of the names that I still know from the Elway days. I read an article talking about how that's the exact reason that all the Denver fans are up in arms about his leaving, which is prolly true. Doesn't hurt that he kicks ass, though.

Re: mock trial. So, turns out that the pre-law fraternity is trying to start up a group. Which is good--takes the pressure off of me having to try to do so (as that almost definitely wouldn't have gotten done this year, now that I've looked at how many hoops you have to jump through). Nobody on the team's got MT experience at this level, though--two of us did it in HS (I think I actually beat her in State two years ago--definitely in rankings, if not also in a physical match) and we were talking after the intro meeting about co-captaining it. Which would be cool. I've pretty much got to join the pre-law frat to captain it, though, it's seeming, as the team's being done through them rather than as a separate club. Which is pricey. And I still don't have my bank card that they were supposed to send me (the form got turned in the 2nd of September, and I already had the account, all they had to do was print me up a card). Nor do I have my Public Speaking book that I ordered more than two weeks ago (totally could have done without it, too, as I know people in that class that I could have borrowed the book from to write my "Teach a chapter of the book to the class" speech, but it was only $6 or so including shipping, so whatever). That one's ticking me off. It's getting negative shipping feedback, LOL (as though most of the delay was probably the post office, the shipping confirmation they sent me says that they didn't ship it for some 5 days after I paid, which is not speedy).

Battery is low on the computer. Must go back now. Final note? Need to find out why I'm so sick pretty much since I moved in here. Dining hall food, methinks, but it's gotten to the point where I'm actually throwing up more days than not because I'm so nauseous.
commotiocordis: Green on black, an animated depiction of a normal heart rhythm on an ECG monitor. (Default)
Best Facebook group ever I've joined today.
Let's say "That's Republican" instead of "That's gay/retarded/stupid."
And the good part: the tag line.
Because you can't help it if you're gay, retarded, or stupid, but if you're a Republican, that's your own goddamn fault.


Sucked in some spit down the windpipe whilst walking on the treadmill this evening and I'm still v. uncomfortable in that "must cough and get it out" kind of way. Suckage.

Primary cohab is out at a frat party. For srs. Makes me laugh because though I was afraid she (and the other two) were going to be the type, primary is the least of the three that I would expect it from. But she admits that it's out of character and she's really just going for the experience. Which I admit I probably would do too, if just to be able to say that I went to a frat party within a week of starting school, LOL.

Got the schedule switched. I'm freaking psyched up for this Classical Mythology class. How cool is that? It ruins my T/Th system of 8-9:15 am class, 9:30-10:45 am class, go to gym, go to lunch, 1pm class, on Thursdays 2-4 pm lab, go home. Which is not nice, as now gym can't happen (lunch still can, but it's only a 45 minute free block and not worth the bike trip + locking the bike + two flights of stairs + swiping the card + fighting for one of the few treadmills for only half a workout) but I'll put up with it for fabtastic mythology goodness.

Speaking of 8am T/Th class, almost was significantly late for that today. Woke up in the middle of the night because I had to pee, and then ended up checking my email and being up for a good 45 minutes or so, which though seeming quite small a duration was evidently enough to set me off sleep-wise, because I didn't wake up until 7:45 when somebody's alarm went off. Hooray for the bike, tis all I can say. I totally would have been right on time if I didn't have to lock the thing up, but as it was, I was only a minute or two late. Ace for that. Considering it's not an inconsiderable ride, plus I had to get dressed and find my shoes and grab my helmet and wheel the bike out of my room down 8 floors in the elevator first, I'm quite impressed.

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